As coaches, many of us find ourselves driven by client results. We want them to do well, to achieve...
Why we need to ditch perfect
Social media allows us to “pretend” that we are perfect. It means that we are sucked in to this idea of perfection, that we need to have a perfect house, body, business, relationship to be happy.
But, it's not true.
Perfection is a myth. This is why people love reality TV and the trashy magazines where they circle your cellulite on the beach or criticise you for having a tummy.
It is not only in the world of celebrity that people display their perfect life. Online entrepreneurs and business owners often do too with glossy, stylised photos and details of their jet set lifestyles. Some of these are (of course) fake but some are true however this is only half the story.
When you start a business you don't wake up one morning and can suddenly buy first class flights or spend a month in Thailand on a beach. You have to take action, attract clients and get them results. This takes time and effort as you need to establish your credibility and hone your message.
Sometimes it gets messy. Sometimes you are knackered but you have a pile of work to do, sometimes your kids are sick and your priorities change because they need cuddles. Sometimes you have calls booked and clients don't bother to call you, sometimes things just don't work out.
This doesn't matter as much as it doesn't if you have freshly applied make up, a blow dry and designer clothes.
People connect with authenticity and vulnerability. I am the first to admit that my life isn't perfect but it is the perfect life for me. Sometimes I don't get enough sleep, on my rare nights out I can overdo it on the wine (or gin). I get angry and I get sad, my house seems to have constant piles of washing and fish fingers is on the menu at least a few times a month.
Does any of this mean I am a bad coach? not at all. If anything it means I understand you more. I never claim to be perfect, I am honest, down to earth and admit my mistakes and I love working with other people like me.
My whole business is based on trust and if I told you starting up a business with a family and working on your own as an entrepreneur is easy then you would be well within your rights to question me.
It isn't but it is rewarding.
That is why I have lots of help, I have coaches to kick me up the bum when I need it, I have a cleaner to make sure my house looks vaguely organised and I have people to help with my business (a VA, a social media manager, a copywriter, a photographer, an accountant, a web designer, a graphic designer…). Because I can't do it all and honestly some of these areas I suck at!
Flicking through instagram and facebook we see these perfect lives, but it is what people show you and how they perceive success and perfection. They aren't going to tell you that they had a huge row with their mother in law that morning or they are still wearing tights despite it being hot as they haven't had time to have a leg wax, or that they did a facebook advert and it bombed.
Think about what you want your life and your business to look like and don't worry about anyone else. If you are authentic and true to you everything will fall into place.
Look past the shiny surface and see what is underneath – is there substance and power? is there learning and compassion? is there humour and love?
As a mum, a wife, a daughter, a friend and a business owner I know I am fallible and I know that I make mistakes. Perfection is a myth, let's bust it and keep being the best version of ourselves.